Appendix Girl.

It always makes me giggle when guys tell me “You have my heart.”

I restrain myself from rolling my eyes. I get that weird feeling when you’re accidentally seated in first class rather than economy. Will someone please downgrade me so that all is right with the world again?

Your heart? Really? Can’t I just have your kidney or spleen or something, I mean, your heart is one of the got-to-have necessary organs. I’m not really a serious, life-or-death relationship kind of girl. On most occasions cat-and-string theory has me goddamn pinned. There was one exception, but that ended badly. Maybe he had realized that I’m really worth nothing more than an appendix. I can be your appendix girl. 

You see, the appendix is a ticking time bomb. It has no benefit, and then will eventually screw you over. Appendix removal is easy. A heart… Well that’s a different story. 

<3