Skydiver.

Does anyone else have those days when you’re just so exhausted that you sleep all day and wake up around six or seven? You’re sense of time is off and you feel incredibly groggy. You spend the rest of your night doing some inane tasks and being unproductive. Your head feels so heavy and your feet are dragging… and you can’t stop thinking about that one person. What are they doing right now. What are they thinking about. Where is this going. 

I always wonder if other people question intentions as much as I do. I’m always searching my crystal ball for signs that things are going to end badly. Normally I don’t put myself into any situation that includes me taking a risk, both emotionally and physically. Now I know why. Taking risks usually come with consequences. Whether it’s a broken wrist or a broken heart, each comes with their own sense of pain. I don’t gamble or roll the dice. I mean, what is the thrill there? Is the adrenaline rush worth the possible outcome? The jackpot is never worth what you may lose.

Skydivers. Why in the world would you jump out of a metal tube in the sky so that (hopefully) a piece of cloth can save you from plummeting to Earth. Sounds like SO much fun. Not. The risk is very obvious, you risk your physical well-being. We’ve grown far too comfortable with taking emotional risks. We place all of our hopes for the future into one person just like eggs into a basket. 

“Heartbreak (noun): grief: intense sorrow; overwhelming distress”

Intense sorrow. Intense. That sounds incredibly risky to me. How has this become a normal occurrence in our society? A part of ‘growing up’? That’s like skydiving with your mental health, fully aware that your parachute is faulty. 

…So when does it become worth the risk? A favorite quotation of mine, “Save your heart for someone that’s worth dying for.” When you can plummet through the open air and not worry about that piece of fabric that may or may not save your from the ground below, that’s when it’s worth it. When everything takes a backseat, including yourself, to put this person first. When it’s six or seven in the evening and all that’s on your mind is them.

Sometimes, you have to roll the dice.